Fire Your Trainer!!

How’s that saying go?

You don’t plan to fail, you fail to plan!

I heard a fantastic analogy comparing training to a car ride. I wish I could remember the source so I could quote the guy…but it went a little something like this:

When was the last time you grabbed your car keys, no wallet, no jacket, nothing, you just bolted out the door, and drove off…no destination in mind, no care about the amount of fuel in the car, no purpose?

“Well there was this one time my girl was driving me crazy and instead of going all silverback gorilla on her I decided it best to just drive. Oddly enough, I found myself sitting in front of the ex’s place. Hmmmm.” Okay, no, not what I was getting at.

I’m talking about you’re just going to make a random left whenever you feel like it, a random right here and there, just stop on the side of the road for no determined length of time to rest and find a random hill to speed up.

Two things: 1) Sounds kinda fun but 2) Sounds mostly kinda stupid. What a waste of time, energy, resources, fuel and purpose.

Here’s the thing…this happens in gyms, every single day 9 times out of every 10 workouts I see in the weight room. No plan, no challenge, no pre-selected purpose. No warm up even, just jump into biceps, chest, biceps, chest, abs, whoa that was too hard, so back to biceps and chest. The ladies have their version that looks more like this: machine cardio like a hamster on a wheel, lots of abs that aren’t overly challenging, some silly little leg movement you think is targeting that fat pocket you hate so much and then of course, more cardio.


I’m going to keep this short. Guaranteed, you are losing 80% of the results you are aiming for (that is why you go to the gym, no?) if you are walking into the gym without a piece of paper in your hand that states what you intended to do while you are there.

I’m talking about a program. Do you have a workout plan to follow and implement when you arrive at the gym?


FAIL. Period. Exclamation point!

And don’t even get me started on the other half of the trainers in EVERY SINGLE GYM that walk around with zero plan for their client. Look, I can barely remember the 12-20 movements of my own warm up sequence, let alone what I intended for that person to do that day, this week, this month so they achieve the result they hired me to help them attain in 6-12 weeks. Let alone for the 6 other clients I’m supposed to see that day. If you think your trainer can remember all of that wow, he or she is in the wrong career and should be a poker champion instead.

That’s why I wrote a while back that there is a stall, a harsh 3 month plateau that happens with these paperless trainers and their clients. I feel sorry for you. The probelm is most people don’t actually know what to expect and demand of their trainers.

Look, worry more about having a plan of action when you walk into the gym than what that actual plan is. Why? Because guaranteed when you reach that 30-45 minute period when things get hard and you get tired, you’re just going to bail out on yourself and do 1/2 or none of what you thought you were going to before you arrived at the gym. If you write it out, you’ll likely stick too it or at the bare minimum learn something along the way about what your capabilities are.

Stop going the random left (bicep curl) followed by a random right (tricep pressdown) preceded with going up this random hill (the ab exercise you mastered 6 months ago that gives you no further real challenge) and lastly, dare your trainer to provide you with a written or typed copy of the workout he or she intends to do…before the day you actually do it.

Here’s an example of what I wrote out for the 4 Saturdays I ran the superstar ladies through during my shape & conditioning class in December: The Parisi Warm Up Method I use has 20+ movements alone!! You think I’m going to remember everything else following that without a pre-written program? HA.

Last time I checked you were paying a personal trainer to write you a personal program to help you achieve your personal goals. If you only hung around long enough, you’d realize that the next 8 people that day the trainer was going to see is running them through nearly the same workout you got run through, yet the clients are all shapes, sizes and have very different goals.

Last rant, do a proper dynamic warm up already. Be an all-star and do some self myofascial release even. And no, that doesn’t just mean a lighter set of bicep curls before the 12 other sets of bicep stuff you have planned. I mean a real warm up that preps your joints and body for all sorts of movements. I got an easy one here for you.

I just can’t stand those make-stuff-up-as-I-go trainers. They make the rest of us look bad. There’s a reason I regularly hear post-workout “wow, that was a tough workout; but it felt really good!” Yep. I planned it that way!

Fire your trainer if he or she falls into the paperless category!!

This entry was posted in RANTS.

2 comments on “Fire Your Trainer!!

  1. Many thanks for your article.

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